Let the kids run free.
“Childhood dreams are forever stuffed in our souls. Take them out and play sometimes.” — Angie Wieland-Crosby
I see other photographers struggling with connection. They come to me and ask how I get those that I photograph to relax and be themselves. There is no secret to this, it’s simply building that connection before they ever step in front of my camera. It’s talking to mom and dad. It’s asking the questions, such as, “Tell me about each one of your children. What do they love? What is their personality like? What’s your favorite thing to do as a family?”
Beyond that, it’s letting the kids “run free”. This is literal and figurative when approaching family sessions.
I want the kids to be themselves. I don’t want to contrive the session to be something that it’s not. Kids are innocent, full of life, and remind us what it’s like to be playful. If I have the parents follow their lead then that’s where the magic happens.
I always get at least one photograph of everyone smiling at the camera, together, but that’s not how we remember our family.
We remember the laughter at the dinner table. We remember those fractions of light, streaming in on their little faces as they wake up in the morning. We remember what it felt like to have their tiny little weight in our arms as we rocked them to sleep as babies. We remember the smell of their skin right after their bath. We remember their silly antics and how they throw their head back in laughter with such pure happiness.
One of my favorite things to do with my daughter is to run in the rain, fully clothed. There is something special about getting wet while dressed. It feels like we’re doing something we shouldn’t and at the same time, it feels like freedom. The smell of the rain when it first hits the pavement and the sound her little feet make when she splashes in the puddles. Her laughter is weightless and carries through the air, almost bouncing off of the water. I took a video, and photos, of my husband and her playing in the rain together and it’s something I treasure dearly. I know that 20 years from now, those will be the photographs I look back on fondly. It won’t be the one of us all looking at the camera (honestly, I don’t really have many of those).
Possibly that’s another advantage of being a photographer; knowing what memories will likely mean the most and those are the ones that should be documented. That’s what I give to my clients. They put their trust in me to tell their story in a way that they will want to re-live it years from now.
I truly believe that my duty as an artist is to not only fully plan out every session based on each, individual family’s personality, but also to build that trust so that they can let their guard down and let me in. These aren’t quick sessions where I tell you where to meet me and to wear whatever you want. This is weeks/months in the making and I’m getting to know every member of your family. I’m planning wardrobe based on each person’s age, likes, aesthetic, etc. We also plan around your home and where you’ll be displaying your art. Everything is cohesive and not a single detail is left out. It’s all a small part of a bigger picture (no pun intended) that is the goal of art you can hand down for generations. I’m not telling “a story”, I’m telling YOUR STORY.
So yes, I let the kids run free at our sessions together. I let them lead. I let them tell the story of their family. They are the ones who see us in our purest forms. To them we are good. To them we are love. To them, we are the magic makers. My goal is that when they are grown, they will look at these and it will hit them that they were the magic after all.
Scroll to the bottom to see a little note about mom’s favorite photograph from the session.
This family traveled from Virginia to do a beach session in Boca Raton. I love my destination clients.
The photograph below was mom's favorite moment documented from their family session.
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Why?
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This is why I love getting to know the people I photograph on such a deep level. She has her three favorite people in the photograph with her, that's easy. But, dig deeper.
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The oldest is closest to me and farthest from her. She's claiming her independence, while still staying close. She's the one who has taught her mother the most. Her mom fully trusts that she doesn't have to watch her as closely, but her presence is still known.
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The middle child is wild with curiosity and freedom. He's still figuring out his boundaries. She lets him go a little, but still keeps right in front of him.
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The youngest is holding her hand, as she still allows adventure in. Mom is learning her; knowing her the least, but needing to give her the most.
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It's a beautiful dance of holding on while letting go. It's something this mother will do for the rest of her life.
